Since I have so much free time I figured I should start exercising more since it's good for you and all that jazz. So I decided to go running. Last night I ran about 3 miles so I pumped it up a little bit and ran the 5 mile loop that I usually run when I'm home. Seeing that it's been a while since I've ran a lot, I am now sore. I guess that's the cost of laziness.
I also decided to tackle my brother's shower today. It's been pretty disgusting for a while now and I told myself that I wouldn't let it get any worse so after my run I decided today was the day. So I grabbed the miraculous magic eraser and got out the four different kinds of tub cleaner from under the sink. After an hour and a half of scrubbing, soaking, more scrubbing, rinsing, dousing, soaking, scrubbing, and finally rinsing we now have a sparkling clean tub, free from mildew buildup and scum. As my dad was evaluating my job well done, he noticed how clean the faucet and handle were; They had previously been covered in some sort of water-mark build up. He said how he had tried to scrub it off with his nails multiple times but had just figured it wasn't coming off. I thought about this for a minute and realized that as humans, we do this much too often. We accept things for less than what they could be. We try to scrub it off a couple of times but give up. Like the faucet and handle, we know that they were once clean, without buildup, but don't see how they could ever be clean again. When we sin, it's often hard to imagine how we can ever be clean again or return to that "mildew-free" state. We often forget what our Savior has done for us and don't take advantage of the power of the Atonement that is available for all of us to use. Because of this "buildup" of "scum", a simple fingernail is not going to remove it. It takes something more powerful, a powerful cleaner and an intense scrubbing, to finally make it shine. Together, with Christ, we can scrub and work to make our "faucets" and "handles" shine like they once did. It's not always easy but we can't give up on what we know is possible. There is a way. There is a hope. We just need to take the time to find Him and work to remove the "scum" in our lives. Just a little something to reflect upon.
Something else that crossed my mind today was about prayer. I had never thought about this before, but I realized that the adversary is aware of our prayers. They know what we are struggling with and what we ask for help on and they work to sabotage our day by working on our weaknesses. They tempt us even more. As they do this, it's then our time to show how devoted we are to not giving in and that we are serious about changing.
Every time I come home from school, I find myself not praying as often and not finding the time to study my scriptures every day. So this summer I am setting a goal: I am going to study for at least 30 minutes every day from the scriptures and Preach My Gospel and other church resources (Ensign, Devotionals, Conference Talks, etc.). To keep myself from falling into the same trap that I find myself in, my good friend Andre and I have made this goal together and we are keeping each other to it by checking up on one another each night. This is day 2 and so far it is working out.
A couple of months ago, I realized that this August I will turn 21 and will be able to go on a mission. I had never thought about this before and thought more seriously about it. After weeks of prayer, going to the Temple, and consulting good friends and family, I made the decision to prepare for a mission. Every time I heard someone talk about their mission or about sharing the gospel in general, I got excited. In the past few weeks I have had doubts about going and all of my worries of going flooded back to me and I questioned whether I should go or not. During this time I had also been slacking in the area of scripture study and the effects were starting to show. It's amazing how something so simple can be so influential. Since realizing my fault and trying much harder to make the time in my day to study the gospel, I have had that reassurance that I once felt. All of my fears and worries that I had before disappeared. I know it will be the hardest thing I've ever done but I also know that it's all worth it. It's going to stretch me and push me far out of my comfort zone but that's what life is about. I can't grow if I never go outside of what I am used to.
